Since my kids were babies, until they were in school full-time, my mother-in-law, the most amazing mother-in-law to ever mother-in-law, would look after them once a week to give me a break. My husband would drop them off at her house on his way to work at 8:00am and pick them up on his way home at 7:00pm.
This break was a saving grace in my life.
Note: The first time she took my six-month-old, I was beyond myself wondering what I was going to do with a full 11 hours to myself. After that first day I never wondered again.
Let it be known I trust my mother-in-law completely, I never had any qualms about leaving my sons with her.
Did I mention that on the days she took my sons she would also send home food with them? Boatloads of homemade pasta, salads and meat that would feed us for the next two days.
It seems selfish of me to continue buying lottery tickets because I’ve already won the inlaw jackpot.
And yet, I looked that gift horse in the mouth because she would do things at her house I would never do at home. When they were young she would carry them everywhere, their feet never touching the ground. As they got older she would make them an individual meal if they didn’t want to eat what she was already making. There were waffle ice cream sandwiches before bed when they slept over, and breakfasts were made to order. Whatever the boys wanted, she would give them.
We jokingly referred to her house as Magic Land. And have no doubt, I wanted to move into Magic Land myself. Disney may have the tagline Happiest Place on Earth but Nonna’s runs a close second.
However, the truth was these little things were stressing me out, until one day in an ‘aha’ moment I realized I needed to take a chill pill. She wasn’t doing anything wrong, she was just doing it differently.
However, the boys needed to know that while Nonna’s house was a magical place, their home was reality.
If they didn’t like what I was making for dinner there was no separate meal being made. The only choice was take it or leave it.
That’s when we developed the “House Rules” rule which is essentially:
You follow the rules of the house you are at whether it’s your grandparents’ or hanging out a friend’s place, but at home you follow our rules.
So if Timmy’s mom thinks it’s a-okay for you to drink a slushie the size of your head while you play a video game that wouldn’t so much as make it through the door of our abode, okey dokey.
But understand that will never happen here, no matter how much you beg, plead, and annoy me.
What happens at Grandma’s house stays at Grandma’s house.
It’s now sixteen years since she first took my son for the day to give me a break and both of my teens still love hanging out at their grandparents’ house. The have an incredible bond and still ask to sleepover in the summer.
And now, every once in awhile, usually in the summer when our schedules are non-existent, I serve up waffle ice cream sandwiches before bed.
We all need a little magic. Even moms.
Tagged under: nonna's,relationship with grandparents,grandparens
Category: mom-101
